Stay-At-Home Moms in Perspective

Browsing Biblical Womanhood during lunch, I came across the following article. I am not a mom, of course, but this excerpt spoke to the purpose of stay-at-home moms that I know and respect, and the reasons behind my wanting to be one someday.

If I identify myself as the culture does, as a "stay at home Mom", one who has no intellectual contribution, gross-national product contribution or status symbol contribution, I become just that: a woman who sees herself as one who has grunted and groaned out another human being and now stays behind her four walls, in self-inposed seclusion. Not much of a vision there--it actually sounds strangely psychotic.

If I deem myself as a woman employed by the Creator of everything ever created, as on work assignment in a sacred domain for the sculpting of souls that will exist forever and forever without end, I have a burning passion of purpose. And a paycheck that is said to be beyond what eye or ear can even comprehend!

Read the full article here!

A Woman's Right to Choose: Beyond the Abortion Controversy

I have decided to post my paper, which attacks (based on philosophical & ethical grounds) the practice of requiring gynecological prodding in exchange for hormonal birth control. I've been hesitant, since I did turn the paper in for a class, but as I don't plan to adapt the paper for any future classes at this point, I don't mind posting it. Just for records' sake, though, in case professors look online, I turned in this paper for my Medical Ethics course in March 2008, and an adapted version for Advanced Composition in June 2008.

I was prompted to go ahead and post my essay after reading a very helpful post by another woman on her blog. Please visit http://crackerscentral.com/wordpress/?p=57 to read.

“A Woman's Right to Choose"

Beyond the Abortion Controversy

“Our body is a machine for living. It is organized for that, it is its nature. Let life go on in it unhindered and

let it defend itself, it will do more than if you paralyze it by encumbering it with remedies.”

(Leo Tolstoy, War and Peace)

Amid the fight for property, suffrage, and abortion, the right to medical options for women has somehow managed to escape the eyes of society. As a result, women remain almost powerless to determine the best method of gynecological care for them. Restrictions placed on oral contraceptives, widespread insistence on annual invasive examinations, and the enthusiastic following for the new HPV vaccine are socially accepted norms to which physicians rigidly adhere. Although research exists to maintain these standards for certain health reasons, equally strong evidence supports the bending or elimination of these stringent practices in favor of the patient's physical and mental wellbeing.

Most medical professionals recommend that women have an annual pelvic exam for one prevailing reason: The early detection of the human papillomavirus (HPV) and cervical cancer. Prior to the 1950's when the pap test became a regular tool for detecting cancerous and pre-cancerous cells, cervical cancer was the number one cancer-caused death in women. Some studies have shown that use of the test has reduced deaths from the disease by 70% ₂. Other reasons include the detection of ovarian, endometrial, and breast cancers, sexual education, and the evaluation of irregular symptoms such as debilitating menstrual cramps, excessive bleeding, and missed periods. Women, according to gynecologists, should begin these annual exams soon after becoming sexually active, but no later than age 21 ₁.
Research also cites a correlation between long-term hormonal contraceptive use and HPV, with an increased risk of cervical cancer ₃. Doctors frequently deny contraceptive prescriptions to patients without a pelvic exam, referencing this medical mantra, as being for the "good of the patient."
However, ethicists are not so willing to accept this hardwired view of "good." Edmund D. Pellegrino, in his book The Internal Morality of Medicine, suggests four individual components to the patient's own good: the medical good, the patient's perception of the good, the good to humans, and the spiritual good. Not surprisingly, the component most frequently found in medical practice is "the medical good," focusing on what will keep the patient most physically healthy. However, Pellegrino writes, "What is medically 'good' simply on grounds of physiological effectiveness may not be 'good', if it violates higher levels of good, like the patient's good as he perceives that good" ₄. Physicians must be "concerned with the patient's personal preferences, choices, and values…the balance he strikes between the benefit and burdens of the proposed intervention" ₄. For some women, the burdens of mainstream gynecological examinations may include emotional distress, feelings of invasion, and betrayal of religious commitment. In many cases, the benefit of early cancer detection, for which most are not at risk, does not outweigh the harm done on a personal level.
Emergency contraception, which contains the highest doses of the hormones in birth control ₅, is not regulated nearly as severely as daily-dose contraception. In fact, adults can acquire the morning after pill as easily as they would Tylenol, simply by driving to a pharmacy and requesting it. Minors in some states require a prescription (given over the phone) or a parent's help to get the pills ₅. In Canada, Plan B has been lowered from "prescription only" to "Schedule II (behind the counter)" status, resulting in a greater in-store supply in many pharmacies" ₆.
Plan B, effective if taken up to five days after intercourse, can cause the disintegration of a developing embryo. Regardless of the morality of abortion, this is definitely more potent and potentially damaging than low-dose hormonal contraceptives.
Yet, "the American Medical Association and the Society for Adolescent Medicine…recently recommended that physicians provide their patients with emergency contraception before they need it" ₅. Advocates for Youth shouts, "Don't wait...go out and get emergency contraception before you need it!" ₅. Why isn't this encouragement and ease of access afforded to women who responsibly plan in advance?
Proponents of annual pelvic exams quote statistics of increased cervical cancer rates in users of birth control. Taken appropriately and in the lowest effective dose, however, oral contraceptives can actually improve a woman's health. Well-known benefits include the decrease in menstrual cramps and protection against anemia, ovarian cysts and symptoms of PMS ₉. Hormonal contraceptives have also been shown to reduce the risk of endometrial and ovarian cancers by up to 80 percent, especially when taken for an extended period, regardless of the dosage ₈.
Cervical cancer, which many experts believe to increase in likelihood with the introduction of contraception, actually may reduce some risk as well. For young women, “evidence of significantly lower incidence of HPV infections in oral contraceptive users than in non-users has been reported” ₃. As a long-term benefit, “regularization of menstrual pattern with hormonal contraceptive use could improve mucosal immunity, and, therefore, immunity to HPV infection, and lower the risk of cervical cancer in later life” ₃.
In reality, cervical cancer is caused by a few specific factors, which many women do not have. According to the World Book Encyclopedia, the main causes include HPV, smoking or inhaling second-hand smoke, sex as a young teenager, and having sex with multiple partners or a man who has had many partners ₇. HIV is also serious indication ₂.
Still, the leading cause remains the human papillomavirus. HPV is less harmful than medical professionals readily explain, with 80 percent of people contracting the virus at some point during life. The majority of these cases disappear on their own, often without the carrier ever knowing they are infected. As the Women in Government organization stresses, “An HPV infection rarely leads to cervical cancer. In most women…the body’s immune system destroys the HPV infection” ₂.
Professionals stress the cancer’s deadliness due to its lack of symptoms. However, some early symptoms actually exist, among them unusual vaginal discharge, spotting, and pain during intercourse. Even these symptoms do not guarantee the disease, but merely suggest further testing, such as a pelvic exam ₂. HPV, though feared greatly as a result of the newly-popular “Will you be one less?” campaign for the innovative vaccine, is more benign than society knows.
In addition to the pap test, new methods of screening for cervical cancer are available, which have been shown to give results more accurately and quickly than the traditional technique. Using the same pelvic exam, a liquid-based pap test can be more accurate, and therefore administered biannually, because the cells are removed from other fluids for close examination. Though not recommended for all ages, an HPV test can be used simultaneously with a pap test for more accurate results ₂.
An article in the Journal of the American Medical Association provides shocking news for women hoping to avoid a traditional pelvic exam. Testing of a self-collected test has shown it to be “less specific than but as sensitive as Papanicolaou smears for detecting high-grade cervical disease” ₁₂. The rates of false positives are higher in the self-collected tests, which one could argue makes the test less helpful. However, the more sensitive the test, the greater a tool it can be for detecting a problem and suggesting further, more traditional, testing. To clear up any doubt, the new test was cross-checked for accuracy with four other cervical cancer screening tests, including the pap test ₁₁. “The availability of a noncytologic screening method not requiring a vaginal speculum examination,” suggests Dr. Thomas Wright and his fellow authors, “may reduce underscreening” ₁₂.
The self-collected test also appears to take less time to produce results, often available within two to six days of the sample. Alternatively, pap test results were not given to patients for about eight weeks. “A patient’s aversion to undergoing pelvic examinations may be difficult to overcome. Testing for HPV DNA by self-collected vaginal swabs at the time a woman provides a routine urine sample would eliminate the need for a speculum examination and would convert cervical cancer screening to a simple laboratory test” ₁₂. Doctors, for whatever reason, do not eagerly disclose these alternatives to their patients, providing cause for concern among patients that they are not being shown all of their options.
As a result, some agencies will delay the requirement for an exam for up to a year after contraception is started. Planned Parenthood, through a program called HOPE (Hormonal Options without Pelvic Exam), allows young women to start on any method of birth control after a medical history questionnaire and a blood pressure check. Though they recommend annual exams, this stereotyped organization actually recognizes the uneasiness experienced by women faced with such a procedure. However, Planned Parenthood will supply only one year’s worth of contraceptives through this program, eventually forcing women into the same standard of protocol to which most doctors subscribe ₁₀. Instead, this organization and others ought to recognize the long-term need for their temporary options. If a young woman can start taking a hormone without a diagnostic test to use as the control, there is no reason to insist upon the test if symptoms do not develop.
In the United States today, women have access to emergency contraception as frequently as they need it, they can obtain abortions with little or no counseling, and they can have long-lasting cosmetic surgery without second opinions. Doctors recommend that smokers quit and that heart disease patients diet and exercise, but they can not force their patients to follow their suggested regimens. Instead, they advise, and then work with the individual patient to develop a treatment or prevention plan that fits his or her personal needs. Gynecologists, to fulfill their calling to work for the patient’s good, need to focus on these individual needs more acutely than the ever-prevalent current standard.
Just as extensive cardiovascular tests are not widely recommended for young, active men with no family history of heart disease, we find no pressing need for women without risk factors for gynecological maladies to have tests for such. There is no reason to require a pap test unless the patient has disclosed something to warrant such a procedure.
In fact, a patient's lifestyle may even do the opposite. Married women with no previous sexual partners and a clear family history may be harmed more than helped. "This anxiety may be greater than the fear of pregnancy, and women might…prefer to switch…to condoms" ₃. This, however, severely limits a woman's options, when there is no critical medical reason to do so. Consider the abortion issue. Few today would suggest limiting a woman's options to adoption in an unwanted pregnancy. Though it can be argued that nine months of pregnancy and birth are more "inconvenient" than the potential discomfort of a condom, we should remember that the first may involve an individual's promiscuity, while the second may have the effect of punishment for harmless personal preference.
Other groups with deep-seated belief factors are happily accommodated, and rightly so, by the medical community. Some Jehovah's Witnesses will not submit to a blood transfusion for reasons of faith. These people carry cards marked "No Blood Transfusion!" with them, quoting the book of Leviticus. Though the Watchtower Blood Policy changed in 2006, many members of this faith still will not receive blood transfusions ₁₃. However, an injured Jehovah's Witness would be helped in any alternative way possible, with reverence for his personal choices. Women who object to invasive exams for similar reasons should be provided the same courtesy and respect.
Physicians have the right to refuse to provide treatment methods to which they have ethical objections, including denial of prescriptions to women who do not submit to tests. However, perhaps the growing fears associated with passing up routine exams in favor of personal choice would not be so prevalent if knowledge of opposing evidence was more common. Women have come so far in their quest for rights and autonomy, from the right to vote to the "pro-choice" movement. We have these rights, ethical or not, but in striving for them, we have overlooked other fundamental choices to which women should have access. Raising awareness, and fighting for these forgotten freedoms, will bring us one step closer to the indubitable right to choose.

Works Cited

1 “Your First Pelvic Exam: A Guide for Teens.” First Pelvic Exam. 2007. Young Women’s Health. 15 Feb. 2008 .

2 Women in Government. “Frequently Asked Questions About Cervical Cancer & Human Papillomavirus (HPV).” Challenge to Eliminate Cervical Cancer. 17 Feb. 2008 <http://www.womeningovernment.org/prevention/documents/03CervicalCancerHPV.CCFAQ1-26-07.pdf>.

3 Brabin, Loretta and Fiona Barr. “Oral contraceptives and cervical cancer.” The Lancet. 360 (2000): 409-410.

4 Pellegrino, Edmund D. The Internal Morality of Medicine. Pages 569-570.

5 “How to Get Emergency Contraception.” Advocates for Youth. 2008. Advocates for Youth. 18 Feb. 2008 .

6 Dunn, Sheila et al. “Availability of emergency contraception after its deregulation from prescription-only status: a survey of Ontario pharmacies.” Canadian Medical Association. (February 12, 2008): 423-424.

7 “Cervical Cancer.” World Book Encyclopedia. World Book, Inc. Volume 2. Chicago, 2003.

8 “Lowest-Dose Birth Control Pills Provide the Greatest Ovarian Cancer Protection.” International Family Planning Perspectives. 33.2 (June 2007): 89-90.

9 “Birth Control Pills.” Planned Parenthood. 2008. Planned Parenthood. 10 Feb. 2008 .

10 “HOPE: Pills Without an Exam.” Planned Parenthood of the Mid-Hudson Valley, Inc. 2008. Planned Parenthood. 10 Feb. 2008 .

11 “Science Blog.” Columbia University College of Physicians and Surgeons. 2000. Science Blog. 17 Feb. 2008 .

12 Wright, Thomas C. et al. “HPV DNA Testing of Self-collected Vaginal Samples Compared With Cytologic Screening to Detect Cervical Cancer.” The Journal of American Medical Association. 283.1 (January 5, 2000): 81-86.

13 “Watchtower Blood Policy.” 2008. AJWRB. 17 Feb. 2008

The views and information represented above are intended for personal use only.

Any other use of the material must be cited completely.

Promises & Promiscuity

One of the things that bothers me about other people is their inherent tendency to be stupid. I certainly count myself under that umbrella, but I think it's safe to say that I think things through before taking a wrong action. And while it may be unfair to demand my values of others, it shouldn't be too much to hold them to their own.

I also don't like the term "pre-marital sex." Where did the "pre" come from, anyway? As I understand it, this is society's non-judgmental way of saying, "They just did it in a different order. They make their own choices, deviated from the crowd" as if their toying with a precious and sacred concept is the equivalent of ordering from the Burger King menu. "Have it your way" has become an all-too-natural behavioral mantra.

What we should be calling it is "non-marital sex." You weren't pre married, you were non married! Of course, this too has earned liberal acceptance. And, oh my, we wouldn't want to offend someone who did it their own way.

Certainly, there are people who just don't care. They've never cared, they don't consider consequences, and they are simply entitled. They were probably raised by parent-people who also never cared and felt entitled. These people, with some exception, are a lost cause by the time they hit their upper teenage years. They've learned a lifestyle, and to teach them differently would be to deprive them of what they once had.

But then there are people that know better. They claim beliefs, both religious and ethical, and vow to stand by them. They convince friends and family of their character and complain about those that deviate from such values. And it is these people who bother me the most when they falter. To deny values is one thing. To hypocritically profess them is another entirely.

I'm sick of my religious friends shacking up. I'm sick of them acting like it's "no big deal," when in fact they have surrendered their moral foundation for the opportunity to "be in love." I'm sick of the sanctity of my marriage (flawed as it may be) being trampled by the widespread approval of someone else's semblance of one.

I'm sick of supposedly chaste girls getting pregnant in high school (or middle school, or college, or their 30's). Though pregnancy itself is not the cause of my sickness, it certainly adds to the number of people their bad decisions impact. I'm sick of young women thinking it's ok to bypass important steps. Do they realize that the life into which they're bringing their baby is not good? Do they even think about the potential consequences - to themselves and their potential children - before spreading it for their horny high school boyfriends? If so, it doesn't seem to stick.

For the religious folk, consider this: You have sex, you're married. That's how God sees it. He doesn't appreciate your methodology, but you've consummated your relationship. You don't get a party. You don't get congratulations. You don't get to wear the pretty white dress.

Except that you do. And that makes me sick.

And when you get pregnant. You don't get a shower. You don't get the adoration of little girls who call you their idol. You don't get to think about how this affects you.

Except that, once again, you do. That makes me sick, too.

But the worst part is the scarcity of regard for the sanctity of sex and life. I am a married woman. Benjamin and I were both virgins when we said "I do." As a result, we share a special bond with each other that few modern young people can claim. Don't you think we were attracted to each other while we were dating? Don't you think we had opportunities to screw around? Don't you think I want babies? Duh!

But we were responsible. Some people think that "getting lost in the moment," having to "do" your significant other right then is a sign of insatiable love that no one understands. Guess what? We do understand - all of us who have made the right choices and retained our ethical premises. Jumping into bed with your high school sweetheart isn't love, it's horniness. And caving into those feelings doesn't make your relationship special and unique, it makes your relationship common and short-sighted.

I guess this is all grounded in my selfishness. I want my responsible choices to be viewed as positive, instead of being dismissed as old-fashioned. I don't want my life to be considered unexciting. And I don't want the things that I want so much in life to be taken for granted, even found inconvenient, by those who haven't earned them.

But when I really think about it, my life is exciting. I have a husband from whom I receive safety and love. We are passionate and loving, and we share a security of which unmarried couples can only dream. So I don't have a new guy every few months, but I get to keep a pretty great one. I don't have a baby to care for, but when I do, he or she will be a cherished blessing. And when I go to sleep tonight, I know that I will be waking up next to the same man tomorrow and for years to come. That's exciting.

Women Are Retarded

In my brief moment of faith-in-human-goodness, I posted a question on Yahoo Answers. Hoping to receive some sort of positive support to my ongoing search for birth control without being man-handled (ie, traditional pelvic exam), I checked back a few hours later. As you can see from the following oh-so-educated responses, people were eager to respond. And not nicely, either. Therefore, I have a new thesis: Women are not, as we previously believed, nurturing, as a rule. They are, to a notable degree, self-sure without cause, belligerent to other women, and outright annoying. And lest there be any further attack, I lump myself in with the rest of them from time to time. Let this be my (and our) motivation to break the vicious, Women-Are-Retarded cycle.

Go to the Yahoo Answers page here! It's formatted better. Answers are open until Thursday.

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My Question
Are there doctors that offer birth control pills without a pelvic exam? I'm married & have never had a pelvic exam. I got a BC prescription from Planned Parenthood through their HOPE program, but that's only for a year. I'm coming up on the end of the prescription, and I desperately do not want a traditional exam. I feel like it would be an invasion of my privacy, and since I've only had sex with my husband (and he with me) and have no family risk factors, I see no reason for this to be a requirement.
Does anyone know of a doctor that will offer birth control without a pelvic exam? I'm belonephobic (afraid of needles), but I would rather have a blood test to check for health issues than violate my personal beliefs.
I live in north Texas, but if there's a doctor somewhere else that offers other options to women, there are probably others. Please help!

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Blondie 2442's Response
im 18 and my doctor just gave them to me without one

My Response
Thanks for the response. Knowing this let's me know that several of the below responses were ill-researched. What doofuses.


Coop <3's Response
A pap smear has nothing to do with how many people you've had sex with. It has to do with checking for irregular cells on your cervix, which are not only caused by STDs. So, guess what, you get to suck it up, and be a responsible ADULT and get yourself to a gynecologist like you should have a LONG time ago. A blood test cannot check for irregular cells on your cervix, so you've just got to go do it. If you want to be a sexually active adult, regardless of whether you're married or not, you need to be responsible for your sexual and reproductive health, or, IMO, you are not in any way ready to be sexually active, sorry. Your discomfort won't mean crap if you get cervical cancer someday, and you realize that it could have been prevented by a simple pelvic exam.

Source(s): I'm a married woman who is a STRONG advocate of women taking control of their own health, regardless of how "uncomfortable" a pelvic exam is. http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-... http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-...

My Response
A pap smear has 90% to do with how many people you've had sex with!!! The #1 cause of cervical cancer is HPV, and the #1 cause of harmful HPV is through sexual contact!

I would like to challenge some of your premises, because you see so sure of yourself:
- "You get to suck it up, and be a responsible adult" - You don't get to tell me what I get to do. You get to run as fast as you can & stop commenting on my questions.
- "get your self to a gynecologist like you should have done a long time ago" - I'm 21! Back off.
- "A blood test cannot check for irregular cells on your cervix" - No, but it can check for an elevated white count, which is present if you have cancer!
- "So you've just got to go do it" - You sure think a lot of your instructions, dontcha?
- "Your discomfort won't mean crap if you get cervical cancer someday" - Sure it will. I've made a conscious choice, dumbass.
- "it could have been prevented by a simple pelvic exam" - No it can't. Cervical cancer can't even be detected fully until it's somewhat advanced. Since when did going to the doctor guarantee someone wouldn't die?

You say you're a strong advocate for women taking control of their own health. I guess what you meant to say is that you're a strong advocate of forcing your opinion about other women's health upon them, and having them let you take control of their health. It's a simple mistake, anyone could have made it.


GreenScreen451's Response
No doctor can force you to have a pelvic exam. I think most would give you the prescription without if you are adamant that you do not want the exam. It might be a good idea though, just to check that everything is alright. It's really not that bad.

My Response
You're right. This is something I wish people would consider before insisting that I am under some sort of health care dictatorship. I appreciate your advice. I will keep this in mind because you are not being a poop.


Hannah's Response
Ask a doctor or someone from a clinic whether you'll need it.! =] Where I am I didnt need one. I needed to be weighed every 6 months and asked a few questions.x

My Response
Awesome! This is very helpful.


WhitneyB's Response
Doctors are required to perform pelvic exams before administering birth control. Even if you have no family risk factors and have only had one partner, problems can still occur. I understand your wanting to protect your privacy, but many of the issues doctors look for in a pelvic exam cannot be detected with a blood test. I prefer to see a female OB/GYN. It's never comfortable for me (I too feel an invasion of privacy with the exam), but at least she is efficient and gentle. If you are truly adamant about not undergoing this exam and do not wish to conceive at this time, your best bet is to use condoms.

My Response
Well, at least you were pleasant, so I can't fault you with anything but being stupid. If I wanted to know if doctors are required to do the test, I would have put that in my question. They're not, which means that you spent too much time submitting to the system and finding someone who "is efficient and gentle" (whatever that means) instead of researching & finding a way to change the social norm. My best bet is not to use condoms. If my point is I don't want foreign crap inside of me, that includes the latex to which I am allergic.


WhoKnows?????????'s Response
first of all the doctor does the pelvic exam for your health. It doesn't have to do with the sexual parteners you have. the problem is that some people may suffer from certain conditions without knowing like endometriosis, or ovarian cysts, and when you take the birth control pills these will make them a lot worse. so the doctor does the pelvic exam for your safety. i did it, there are no needles invovled nothing, he will insert a plastic to see the inside of vagina etc. to see that there are no scarring. So if I were you i would do it, especially if you are going to take the birth control pills for a long time.

Source(s): studying to become a doctor

My Response
Wow, you're studying to become a doctor? Yesterday I was studying to become an astronaut. If you'd like me to give you some advice on launching yourself into outer space (it's "for your health") let me know. I'm just saying, I think there's a reason they give you the short coat. And yes, genius, it does have to do with how many sexual partners you've had. And I know there are no needles. And if you want to be a doctor, you still have to know how to comprehend what you read & spell correctly. If a doctor wants to amputate your leg, I'm sure he would say that's for your safety, too. You still have options. So while I appreciate the paragraph you've quoted from you're MCAT study guide, I'd appreciate it more if you would can it until you can present some irrefutable facts.


AW's Response
Suck it up. You are a big girl. Cancer and other health issues can develop at ANY time in your life even if you have NO risk factors. I just found out a friend of a friend who is 45 years old was given 2 months to live TOPS due to cancer. He had no previous problems, he had absolutely no family history of any kinds of cancers. Exams are also to prevent future problems not just know what you have done. You have a severe phobia about this. What is going to happen when you have children? Are you going to refuse to go to the doctor because you feel that a doctor looking there is an invasion of your privacy? That is disgusting, quite frankly, that you would risk the lives of possible future children along with your own.

My Response
You're just being a jerk. How do you know I'm a big girl? I'm actually a little girl who would like her mommy to punch you. I bet your friend would not have gotten cancer & would still be alive in 3 months if he had gone to his gynecologist every year before he took his birth control pills. Right? Cite relevant anecdotes only, please. If you need a support group to deal with your friend's death, don't take it out on my question. Given that you have the authority to diagnose my "severe phobia about this" (by the way, the appropriate preposition is "of") you should be able to deal with your grief without taking stage 2 out on me. Actually, except for a torn hymen a doctor can't tell what you've done. Since you seem so interested in what goes into & comes out of my vagina, my husband & I have decided to have our children at a birthing center or at home. Midwives & doctors at birthing centers allow a more natural process without the social requirements and restrictions to which you seem so attached. I prefer not to risk the lives of my "potential future children" by stabbing them with amniocentesis needles and exposing them to the HPV vaccine. Doctors say those are good, too.


ChellB's Response
All I can say it is so important to get pap/pelvic exam done. I knew a woman that waited till she was 30 to get a pap done and found out she has stage 4 cervical cancer. she is no longer living. I don't know any doc that would not do an exam first.

My Response
I appreciate your opinion. It is important to consider the potential complications of a decision such as this. After thinking about all of the harm, I've made up my mind that I would prefer to take the chance on cancer. I'm also sorry for your loss of a friend. I'm sure she didn't get to make the same conscious decision as I have.


DX's Response
Yes. While many doctors do require the pelvic exam, some will now prescribe BCP without it. Go to another Planned Parenthood, or call the one you're visiting now and explain the situation. Most PPs will give you the pills to protect yourself. If not, talk to your family doctor.

You should know that cervical cancer can affect anyone, regardless of family risk factors and can be a very nasty customer. If you're fully aware of this possibility and still don't want the full exam, try to get yourself the HPV vaccine, at least. If you're forced to take the exam to get the pills, you can also ask them to only do the Pap and test for HPV and leave out the rest.

I currently take BCP but I do not go for pelvic exams. I am NOT sexually active, have no plans to be, and I take the pill for endometriosis. I get my weight and blood pressure checked every six months to ensure everything's in order. I did get an exam two years ago--under sedation because I am an abuse survivor and it was such a traumatic experience--and was found to be fine and HPV negative, so I'm not considered to be at risk.

Source(s): current experience with BCP

My Response
I think this is the most helpful response. It came about 5 hours ago, and I would have slept a lot better had I read it last night. I won't get the HPV vaccine because I won't get any vaccine. They make you sick before they make you better. I will try another PP and hope for good results.

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How sad, that we have become so blind as to accept a medical practice simply because it has become customary.

Home Sweet Home

(Original post at www.abforever.blogspot.com)

Well, sort of =P

It's been forever since I've written on this thing, so I don't really even know where to start! Benjamin and I had a beautiful wedding, made complete by our family and friends who shared it with us. I can't believe that I wanted an outdoor reception, though. It was hot! Mom & I checked the forecast the day before the wedding, and all was supposed to be sunny and dry. On Saturday, though, we realized that Benjamin didn't have the vest to his tuxedo, so we made an emergency trip out. It was nice though...we were so busy that neither of us had an opportunity to really get nervous!

Ok, well I'm getting ahead of myself lol. Julie & I went to Houston on Tuesday, and Tuesday night Megan, Jill and Veronica threw my bachelorette party. It was lots of fun...they even had a Disney princess tablecloth! (though there were some "inappropriate" paraphernalia drawn on it hehe). I got a little loopy and ended up falling asleep. I was partially awake again when they had a slightly-dressed guy burst through the front door and run through the living room.

Benjamin was supposed to work all day on Thursday and then drive to Houston on Thursday night. However, the little sucker (ok, sweet and sexy babe) left work without telling me and showed up at my parents' house in the very early evening!

On Friday night we had the official rehearsal. However, it didn't really count, because Julie was in Georgia for a convention, Amanda was on her way to Houston, Jason was at training for his new job, the flower girl was en route, and the minister was at church camp in Ohio. Benjamin & I went to get manicures & pedicures, and were a little late. The "wedding coordinator" (aka meany-poopy-head) was a total snot, and started treating me like a little kid. She was telling Benjamin's parents to do the wrong things, and trying to completely take over myyyyyy wedding!

Wedding Coordinator: come on!
Benjamin's mom: I think we weren't supposed to walk in during this song.
Wedding Coordinator: It doesn't matter, it's fine.
Me: *nicely* Hey, could we try that again, with the other song?
Wedding Coordinator: You want to do it again?!
Me: *slightly less nice* Well, they weren't supposed to come in to this song.
Wedding Coordinator: *huff*

Later...
Wedding Coordinator: You need to do the unity candle now.
Me: *listening to the minister/Benjamin/etc* *notice she's yapping, so I look at her*
Wedding Coordinator: *really snotty look* Can we take this seriously please?
Me: Sure. *hand on hip, 4th grade girl rebellious look*...(hey, it was my wedding)
Wedding Coordinator: Fine! I'll just let you do it your way.
(keep in mind, we didn't want her there in the first place...she wasn't "coordinating" anything)
Me: *sweet tone* Thank you!
Wedding Coordinator: Uh! *snatches our candles & walks off to get her purse*
Wedding Coordinator: *to my dad* It doesn't look like you'll be needing my services here any more this evening.
Dad: Oh, ok! Bye!

I asked Ethan if he had gotten it all on tape, and he said yes. I can't wait to see it. She was sooo mad hehe.

The day of the wedding went smoothly for the most part. I was a little worried that something major would be forgotten, but it was all great. I remember making Julie go out & take pictures from the balcony so I could make sure enough people were there to start. (I didn't want everyone having to be in the balcony!) When Dad & I came in, I hardly noticed anyone in the audience. I didn't realize beforehand that I wouldn't see the audience at all until we were presented Mr. and Mrs. The main things about the ceremony that were "funny" I suppose, were that I couldn't blow out my candle after lighting the unity candle because my veil blocked it, so Benjamin had to blow it out. Then, when Benjamin was allowed to "kiss the bride," we kissed for what I guess was a long time. People started laughing, and the minister kind of cleared his throat a little. At the reception, Jill, Veronica & Matthew commented that it was quite passionate. Jill said she accidentally pinched Matthew, and Veronica said, "I'm told that if you begin a marriage with a lot of passion, it'll continue that way. So, I think you'll have a passionate marriage!"

When I tossed the bouquet, Julie & Amanda had a little tustle. I have a picture of them both going for it, and another one where Amanda has a "ha!" look on her face, and Julie has her fists clinched and seems to be charging. It's awesome =P

Juliane & Ryan gave their speeches, and both were so heartfelt. I know that Benjamin and I love our siblings dearly, and were so glad to be able to share the first wedding for both families with them.

I rode all the way to Galveston in my wedding dress. This was not the best idea, for 2 reasons. One, it can feel somewhat comfy while you're standing up, but when it's late and you're tired, and the bra is digging into your boobies and bruising your sternum, it's not quite so comfortable. Two, we didn't really think ahead about how we were going to fit my giant dress in our luggage for the cruise. But, I wanted Benny to be able to take it off of me, so I suppose it was worth it. And since he doesn't pack much stuff, there was room in his suitcase :)

We spent Saturday night and Sunday night in Galveston. Sunday we walked around a little bit, went to the grocery store, and got a pizza from Dominos. Or Pizza Hut. One of those places lol. Monday we took a taxi to the port. Benjamin wanted to make sure we were there "on time," so we ended up getting there before anyone else. We were wearing our "Bride" and "Groom" shirts, so everyone we talked to thought we were part of a wedding party. Of course, that meant that they sent us up to the waiting room with the actual wedding party, which was apparently preparing of an on-board wedding. Other than them we were the first ones on the boat! We had opted to carry most of our luggage on, a decision that we remedied getting off the boat. (If you take a cruise, don't carry your stuff. It's a long walk.) Going through security, one of my bags set off the alarm, and when we saw which one, I freaked. (You don't need to know the details.) To make a long story short, we had crashed Benjamin's bachelor party the week before, and his mom had gotten some handcuffs for me to put on him during our raid. I had stuck them in my bag and forgotten about them, and, well...apparently they don't allow handcuffs on cruise ships. Oops!

On the boat, we lugged all of our luggage (is that why they call it luggage?) to go eat lunch before the rooms were ready. Benjamin called our parents to tell them we had made it, and his mom told him a funny story. It totally made our day. Everyone, including Mrs. Wedding Coordinator, had been asked not to wear perfume to the wedding, because of allergies. She showed up about 10 minutes before the wedding:
Ryan: Do you have the candles for lighting the unity candle?
Wedding Coordinator: I don't know! I thought you didn't need me!
Ryan: *really nice voice* We don't...we just need the candles.
Wedding Coordinator: Well, I may have some in my car. I'll check.
Later...
Aaron (usher): *doesn't know who she is* Are you friend or family?
Wedding Coordinator: Well, I'm not family!
Aaron: *smells perfume on her* Ok, well I'm going to need you to sit up here.
Wedding Coordinator: *epitome of ticked off*

My parents and Benjamin's parents had gone to lunch on Monday, so they got to hear the story before we did. The cruise was awesome! I wasn't scared at all, and I didn't get seasick! More about that later, perhaps. Our room steward learned our names, and would always come in our room while we were gone & make cool towel animals to put on the bed. He even arranged my pink pillow on the bed with the others =P

We stopped in Progresso and Cozumel. In Progresso, I got sick from the cigarette smoke and the heat, so we just bought some tequila and got back on the boat. In Cozumel, we did some shopping. Benjamin wanted to rent a motorcycle thing, but I forgot about the fact that we could go all over the island. Instead, we bought more tequila (he brought back a ton of tequila), and took lots of pictures. It sprinked a bit, and we were ready to go in, so we got back on the boat and drank a margarita. On the last day, we needed 4 more cups to complete our "4 yellow, 4 pink" collection, so we had to get started early. We split our first pina colada around 10 am. And I don't hold liquor very well, so needless to say I was a little wobbly for the rest of the day.

Now we're back (duh, Adriane), and getting into the swing of things. The apartment still isn't organized, but at least we've opened all the presents, and the ones we need to take back are filling up the back seat of my car. I still have a ton of thank you notes to write, but I'm dreading that. I think it's the sheer volume of notes that is stressing, not the act itself. If I do like 20 a day, it shouldn't take too long.

Viagra Commercials

(Original post at www.abforever.blogspot.com)

(I'm not sure if I spelled that right...)

Anyway, as I was mindlessly putting away my groceries, I heard a commercial on tv:
"Viagra is suitable for men with all levels of er*ct*le d*sfunct*on....Ask your doctor if your heart is healthy enough for sex."

I apologize for the *'s...I still feel like it's a dirty word lol. It shouldn't be, since I am a soon-to-be-married woman, but none-the-less...

Ok, so now that we're all sufficiently uncomfortable...I witnessed a serious cat fight at Wal-Mart tonight. A lady (and I use that term loosely) got all freaked out, and started pushing another lady out of the way, and hollering, and tattling to the supervising cashier lady at the self check-out. I was already stressed by having been held up several times, so I was ready to just knock everybody's heads together & call it a night. Luckily, though, I have a healthy capacity for self-restraint, and I managed to get by with just giving a probably-unnoticed annoyed look to the unlady-like lady.

Tootles!

The Proposal

(Original post at www.abforever.blogspot.com)

Benjamin and I had been seriously discussing marriage for several months. Still, he wouldn’t give any hints as to when or how he planned to propose. So I waited (sometimes impatiently, to which he will attest) for him to get everything ready.

On Saturday, May 12, 2007, I suspected nothing. Honestly, despite the fact that I was sure a proposal was coming soon, the possibility of it happening that weekend didn’t really enter my mind.

That morning, we had made plans to go to the Botanic Gardens after church. We had been there about a month before for a picnic (I absolutely love picnics), and it is beautiful. That time, I actually thought he might propose. Later, I thought about telling him that I would really like him to do it there, but decided against such an intervention, as he said he already knew what he planned to do. I didn’t suspect anything this time, though, because he asked very casually if I wanted to go. Plus, I was tired of getting my hopes up =P

We went to church in Fort Worth as usual. The building is always chilly, but it was especially freezing during the Bible study. Normally, Benjamin would have given me his jacket, but this time he kept it on, fanned himself with the handout, and offered to get my princess blanket out of the car. (He brought it up later, explaining that he didn’t want me to be wearing his jacket & notice the ring inside.)

During church I whispered that I was looking forward to going to the park. He took that opportunity to ask if I minded Ryan (his little brother) coming with us, because Ryan wanted to ride in his new car. I felt kindof let down, thinking that Benjamin should have known that I consider parks our own little romantic thing. I said that if he needed a ride home, we could just go another day, trying to hide my disappointment.

After church, Benjamin said that he would go pull up the car (since he had parked a long way out to avoid “dings”) while I finished my drink inside. However, it took him longer than I expected because, as I later learned, he needed to move the ring to his guitar case. Again I inadvertently interfered, when my impatience led me out to the car in my 4” heels.

When we arrived at the Botanic Gardens, he handed me the blanket and asked me to go set up under our tree while he found a way to cover his camera and guitar in the back seat. (Due to my previous interruption, he still needed to move the ring.) I unknowingly made his objective harder, insisting that we walk together. Finally I said, “just bring your camera with you, and leave your guitar uncovered in the car.” We walked to our tree and laid out the blanket. On the way, I saw some people taking wedding pictures, and pointed it out to Benjamin. I’ve been doing this from time to time, partially because I think it’s neat, and partially to remind him that I want to get married…as if he had forgotten lol.

As we were still wearing church clothes, Benjamin said he wanted to change into flip-flops. By this time, I was like, “It’s about to rain, and you’re concerned about changing out of your shoes?” He insisted on getting them from the car, so I waited. When he returned, he only brought his guitar.

He started playing a song from memory as usual, but then stopped. He picked up a page of tabs from his case, and told me he hadn’t put the rest back in there after he cleaned it out. I just thought, oh, ok…new song, cool, what is it?

Scanning the page as though he had not played the song before, he answered, “It’s called ‘Question’.” I’ve heard the song, so I’m sitting there thinking, “Greeeeat! I know he’s not going to propose today, yet he’s going to sight read this song about proposing.” I started to inform him of this little discrepancy, but he had already started playing. I figured, Oh well, he’ll figure it out in a minute, and we can have a good laugh. When he got to the chorus, I realized he knew the song and had picked it intentionally:

Someday somebody’s gonna ask you
A question that you should say yes to
Once in your life, maybe tonight
I’ve got a question for you.

I also grasped that he seemed to know the tune awfully well for never having heard it. I looked at his face, saw his nervousness and excitement, and focused on experiencing the final seconds of singleness.

When he finished the song, Benjamin set down his guitar and picked up a wooden ring box. By this time he was crying. He opened the box, and said, “I love you so much. Will you marry me?”

I, of course, immediately said “yes,” and leaned over to kiss my fiancé. I may have whispered it, because later he asked if I had actually ever said yes.

Then I finally got a good look at the ring. It was a beautiful square solitaire in a shiny platinum setting. I had not helped to pick out the ring, and even though he knew what cut I wanted, I had been a bit nervous about what he’d select. But as with everything he’s picked out for me, it was perfect. He started to hand it to me, but I said, “you have to put it on my finger!” When he slid the ring onto my finger, I was happier than ever.

I didn’t react at all how I always thought I would – I figured I’d either shriek or start bawling. I don’t think I fully believed everything that was happening. After all, he wasn’t “supposed” to do it then!

As we packed up and left, it started to rain. I love the rain, I love the park, and I love my wonderful husband-to-be.

Smart Girls Unite!!!

I was gonna post something here, but I'm not going to. It was kinda funny though, so if you're interested I'll show ya :P

Yikes! Heights!

Working at B&N is going to be like the cliche, "kid in a candy store"...I've already found way too many books that I need to read.

Apparently I'm "all set for marriage" because I like to sweep, do dishes, and most of all do laundry. Not all set to work at Barnes & Noble, not all set for having my own house, but all set for marriage...lol. Of course, let the record show that I like to do these things to maintain not to clean up after annoyingly gross people, and not because someone is ordering me to, and not because I think it's my God-appointed responsibility in life. But yes, I do like these things, especially when I have time to do them well.

Tomorrow I work at Ben & Jerry's, and then Saturday I'm OFF!!! Completely. No working at Ben & Jerry's. No working at Barnes & Noble. I plan to spend Saturday evening catching up on the laundry and organizing that I've been trying to get done, and reading because it's peaceful and I look forward to devoting an entire 4-5 hours to just...reading.

Now I'm going to devote the next hour to taking a shower & eating pizza. Ah, ze life...

Oh! I had to stand on a rickety ladder today. It was very shakey and I'm very scared of heights. It wasnt that high up at all, but the floor was wet, and did I mention that the ladder was rickety? Yes, I nearly died. Isn't that the most logical conclusion to draw from hights-scared + rickety ladder + wet floor? I sink so.

Ok, here's that nostalgic post we've all been waiting for!

Stop. Go no further. Start the song Closing Time. Have you started it? Ok good. Now you may proceed.

In about 12 hours (I’ve been working on this throughout the day), I'm going to be moving for the 2nd time in a year. I'm so unbelievably happy to get to go home, see my family, spend oodles of time with my Mom...it's been hard living so far away. By the same token, though, I'm going to be so sad to leave this place - this apartment that has become my home away from home, these friends, this environment of intellectual stimulation. So, in the style of Zahra's post (her's is more picture-inclusive than mine), I shall proceed to give a list of grievances. Ah, how this reminds me of a day about 8 months ago when I was doing this very same thing.

While I'm certainly going to miss many aspects of this life I'm leaving, most of it revolves around the lovely girls of apartment ****. These girls have turned into more than amiable roommates. They've made my freshman year experience one that I will always look back upon with fondness. They have attained the status of best friends. And for that, they hold a special, irreplaceable place in my heart. I will miss them the most.

Things I Love About Julie
* Her French accent which she "can't help"
* Her decision to marry Switchfoot...collectively
* The inertia which causes her arms to flail behind her torso upon walking
* The way I never dread the sound of "Aaa-dri-on" (now "A-shri-on") in the distance
* She is always ready to watch a Lifetime movie with me & Sparky
* Her insistence on consuming every last speck of...whatever (lick that bowl, Julie!)
* The way she confidently declares herself endearing...but that she doesn't fully comprehend the limitlessness of that statement
* Her daily updates on Erwin in my absence
* Finding her slippers tucked neatly under the table for her to come back to
* Her pretty paintings that make our living room sparkle

Things I Love About Zahra
* Her beastly willingness to protect us amid our Lifetime fears…and to fight
* The fact that she LIVES to "lock me out"
* The way she "moves in" every Sunday evening
* That she is "the world's official hugger"...and never fails to deliver on that
* That she designates and entire load of laundry to her panties
* Her offer to come all the way to Houston just to chaperone a date
* That we reached a consensus to take a nap under the warm pink UTD blanket after Hope Floats

Things I Love About Valene
* Her facial expression after muttering “huh?”
* Her disgust with spinach…and our taste for it
* That she gave me part of the vacuum fuzz after cleaning it out
* The unrecognized peer pressure which she exerts on the rest of us with her spiffy sayings

I’ll miss the Waterview network connection hating me, and kicking me off alllll the time. Zahra, thank you for not blocking me on AIM, even though you threatened to do so. Having a reliable internet connection will be saddening.

I’ll miss Julie grabbing Luke & Lorelai with her bare hands so that we can clean their filthy water. I’ll miss having 4 people around to feed them constantly. And I’ll miss making beta babies!

I’ll miss the free movies that Valene found as part of our cable package. Sleepless in Seattle, West Side Story, Funny Girl…all better when you have great girls to share them with. Oh what fun, moving the couch up to the TV…we’re tough girls!

I’ll miss naming the boys that come into our lives. More than that, I’ll miss having those boys around to do things for us. I wonder if my brother….

I’ll miss hearing Julie’s door open in the mornings, and jumping out of bed immediately. That was better than any alarm clock. What! Julie’s up before me?! Aaaah!

I’ll miss calling the maintenance men for everything that needs done in our apartment. I treasure all of those maintenance reports that we have laying around. We’re on a first-name basis with several of them now!

I’ll miss looking at Jackie Chan every time I go into Julie’s room. I have to say, he’s beginning to grow on me now. Of course, the same can’t be said of Julie’s attitude toward my fuzzy posters. It’s ok…I’ll also miss her systematically removing them from my walls in the hope that I won’t notice.

I’ll miss shouting “someone’s food is ready” because the impatient microwave keeps beeping once a minute.

I’ll miss Julie trying to make me get new PJs. You’ve tried everything, and I’m still wearing cheeky monkey! Perhaps, though, we can get matching ones in accordance with your bribe.

I’ll miss the interrogation chair, and the reign of WABB over our relationships with boys. I’ll miss the confused look on many guys’ faces as we actually carried out the interrogations we promised. Remember when Cake Boy (ok ok, Tony) brought us that HUGE cake as a peace offering? I’m glad we gave him another chance.

I’ll miss Julie’s singing on the way to the grocery store or the movies. You’ve made me love Moulin Rouge, hun! You’re so unbelievably cute.

I’ll miss Thursday lunches in the PUB. How I’ve looked forward to those each week, and hated missing them on occasion. Even when I would be working the lunch rush, it was cheering just to see you guys come in.

I’ll miss the PUB itself, and the good friends I have made working there. I’m so blessed to be able to have fun at my job.

I’ll miss Roommate Weekends, and broadcasting our mutual love to the masses. “Do you have roommates? You should get some.”

I’ll miss taking trips in our pajamas. Wal-Mart, the Meteor Theater, the mailbox…ah, the memories.

I’ll miss Julie singing “Bad Day” and playing it on her computer when I have one. I’ll miss being able to hear the song on her computer when she goes to Zahra’s xanga, since my computer hates me & won’t play it.

I’ll miss having a home to come back to when I feel weezy.

I’ll miss taking pictures of everything. It feels like everything we’ve done has been properly documented visually. I love our three best pictures.

I’ll miss the menopausal weather. Hot. Cold. Moderately warm. Freezing beyond comprehension. Yeah, it’s always a surprise. Sorry I’ve been slacking on delivering the weather report each morning!

I’ll miss having no room in the refrigerator for legitimate stuff (like milk) because it is so full of to-go boxes.

I’ll miss the yellow walls, and Julie’s paintings.

I’ll miss finding my panties in a bag on my doorknob. I’ll miss having girls around who understand how you can have an entire bag full of panties.

I’ll miss waking up to the shrill sound of smoke detectors…and laughing in the living room while they continue to shriek for half an hour in the middle of the night.

I’ll miss eating french fries from the PUB. But not before we’ve re-cooked them in the oven & showered them with Tony Chachere’s (sp??)

But more than all of that, I’ll miss having girls to call maintenance for me. I’ll miss hearing my name (with a French accent, of course) on a daily basis. I’ll miss the people with whom I take grocery store trips, and the girls that live to lock me out. I’ll miss having those awesome friends who are willing to ask weird questions to make sure that the guys I’m hanging out with are worth it. I’ll miss deep conversations that last until the wee hours of the morning, and buying lots of pillows with my new bedding, confident that we’ll use all of them.

The memories…

In the past 8 months and 19 days, we have accomplished so much. Much more than a group of skimpy college girls could be expected. We have:
(click the * for a picture!!)
* Gotten through a pregnancy & learned French insults
* Successfully sauntered Wal-Mart in PJs at midnight without getting raped
* Learned how to do normal body functions in a class that 1/3 of us don’t take
* Cured Julie of her brownie addiction
* Established ourselves as virgins
* Taken pictures with Abuelo
* Been through some hard times, and remained there for each other
* Experienced the awesomeness that is giant QuikTrip cups
* Considered skydiving together…nah!
* Had fun with balls (hehe)
* Shrunk our collective female fat zones
* Traded clothes & warned each other of possible death-by-weather
* Made it through Govt 2302. ‘Nuff said.
* Realized that our best dates are with each other
* Giggled about boy parts during Thursday lunch
* Put glucose tablets to a much more “creative” use
* Gotten married. Some of us more than others…
* Been totally awesome princesses
* Gotten gussied
* Turned on one another, but made it through in the end
* Been scarred by the sight of nakey boys & discussed nakey trees
* Ordered & eaten 3 medium 1-topping pizzas
* Handled the three-musty-Mexican-maintenance-men & called maintenance for EVERYthing! They must loooooove us!
* Discovered the tragedy of the female condom & hemorrhoids
* Prepared for a tornado
* Had a slumber party on the balcony
* Grown quite accustomed to talking on AIM & banging on walls
* Experienced the happiness of Julie & Zahra’s marriage
* Left Olive Garden with 10 to-go boxes
* Gleefully pounced upon each other
* Caught & detained the blog culprit…but she still commits her crimes!
* Become tenacious wildcats in Jujitsu
* Dedicated Zahra the confrontational-phone-call maker…for bills and the cable guy
* Named boys & done interrogations with WAAB
* Spoken out against modern sexuality
* Played some serious flag football
* Toasted our 1-month anniversary
* Disturbed an entire movie theater with our fashionable exit
* Learned where we come from…through the people upstairs
* Lived through fire
* Rewarded ourselves with a couple of our favorite jelly donuts
* Left our comfort zones & made new & lifelong friendships

Tonight we had our reminiscence session. We sat on the couch, in our PJs of course, and ate french fries. We talked about our time together. Zahra recalled “hating” me when I moved in, because I apparently gave her a weird look. How was I to know that she was supposed to be there?! We realized that we attended the same orientation last April. The 3 of us recalled our first eager telephone conversations and unleashed first impressions. Julie thought I was going to be a drunken popular girl…but when she came in & saw me “freaking out” over groceries, she knew she had nothing to fear. I thought she was going to be a really anal smart girl…which she is (without the anal part :-p). Zahra addressed how unfair I have been in taking up all of the communal kitchen & storage space…and Julie agreed. Apparently, I have too much crap…but I can’t live without it. Then Julie started to go into her room. I thought she was coming to my room to read this screen (a super no-no) so I ran to stop her. In the process I hurt my foot. She doesn’t care…she said I deserved it. Poo. :-)

I’m sitting here, now at 2:30 in the morning, after just having had a discussion with Julie. Mostly, we talked about how much I miss orchestra & what a big part of my life that was. I’ve often thought about where I would be in my musical pursuits if I had followed my original plan to go elsewhere.

But tonight, after our reminiscence session, I realized that Julie, Zahra & I ALL wanted to go elsewhere. I wanted to go to Sam Houston & major in music. Zahra wanted to go to Rice & made this known through her attitude at UTD orientation. Julie wanted to go to Baylor & got a new car instead. I remember fighting my parents about this school, telling them it was the last place I wanted to go. I even had all of my friends hating the idea with me.

Even after deciding that I did want to come here, I still catch myself wondering. I wonder what I might have kept if I hadn't abandoned my “first choice.” What’s ironic is that after 8 months, I now realize what I would have lost if I had.

Love Always,
Adriane

Virgin Persian

We watched Monster in Law instead. Julie & I decided to get up at 6:30 to write our papers.

After the movie...
me: so we need to get up at 6:30, right julie?
julie: can I write my paper tonight?
me: yeah, I was gonna cheat & write mine tonight too!
so we're cheating on our plan & writing them tonight...that's what happens when you have conscientious people trying to pose as procrastinators.

We all know that Julie calls Zahra "Persian"...
julie: Persian!
me: *mouth agape* ...oh, I thought you called her "virgin"
julie: can I call you "virgin" and zahra "persian"?
me: well that would imply that she's not one
julie: no, persian overrides virgin
zahra: *who has been sitting, quietly listening* what?!

Hello Again!

As this post has become rather long & addresses several distinct subjects, I shall precede each section with a title. Consider it a bunch of short posts, if you will. I'm really not dorky. Well, if I am, then you are probably one of those people who doesn't mind, as you're reading my blog...

Time in Temple
I returned to Dallas on Sunday evening after spending a week & a half in Temple, TX...a town that consists of a Wal-Mart, a hospital, an IHOP, and several lonely miles of I-35. I'm really grateful for the opportunity to have gone, not for the chance to experience their competitive tourist attractions, but to be with my Mom & the rest of my family during the beginning of our ongoing trial. My Mom is doing better, and has been released from the ICU (Saturday night), but she will be in the hospital for a very long time before further recovery can take place at home, and continued prayers are gratefully appreciated.

Term Paper Total Petrification
I realized last Tuesday night that my Linguistics term paper would be due on Monday (uhh...2 days ago). So, rather than ask someone to build a library in Temple (the IHOP looked lonely...) and then learn how to find things in it, I went to Houston to do my research. Then I proceeded to stare at my bag full of library books and my laptop without actually reading or typing. I kindof realized that trying to do real work there would avail little.

Mercy for Monday
My aunts & my dad suggested that I ask for an extension, but I couldn't bear to do so...I knew about the assignment all semester, though I had intended to write it in the 2 weekends before it was due (for which I was gone). Thankfully, my professor gave me a 1 week extension without my having to request it. I had not been so happy for so shallow a reason in quite some time!

Work & Play All Day (...that one's not alliteration, but it rhymes!)
I'm glad to be back at work, cause it's fun to socialize. And of course it goes without saying that seeing my roommates/best friends has been the highlight of my recent return.

Take Back the Night March (ok...I've tired of witty titles)
Last night I went to the Take Back the Night March & Rally. It was awesome. Though I was more than a little ticked off by the giggling girls up front who could not seem to muster the balance to control their alcohol-free drunken wobbling, the event soon gave off the respectful aura that would be expected by someone, say, not unhealthily obsessed with their stereotypical sorority image.

Possible Summer Opportunities
I spoke with the lady in charge of a public policy organization in Austin after the presentations. Since I'm interested in that kind of work, I asked if she could suggest any organizations in Houston to whom my volunteer work could be useful. She also suggested that I look into their organization if I'm ever in Austin for a summer (Do we sense another potential summer in Austin?!).

Free Movies!
Valene surprised Zahra & me by asking us if we wanted to watch a free movie. Apparently, you can push the button for On Demand on the remote, go to Free Movies, and a whole list awaits you! Can you believe that we've been living here for 8 months, and have not discovered the wonderful thing that is Free Movies? So, we started Sleepless in Seattle. Valene then found that you can even fast-forward & pause the movies! This is awesome. I hope it's not some kind of trick that greedy cable companies use to trick little college girls into spending their scholarship money on mind-wasting tv. I think I'll go look at the list again, and pick out a movie for later.