Respecting Those Closest

Yesterday, my husband and I were talking, and I asked him, "What is the number one thing that I could change to make our relationship better?" He said, "Have a better attitude."

His response startled me. In my mind, I generally have a good attitude. I give people the benefit of the doubt, I’m careful not to snap at people who can’t control/didn’t cause my problem, and I work to let minor things go. I go so far as to think about what a stranger or acquaintance might be going through, and cut them slack.

But do I show the same consideration for my husband? Sadly, that answer is often a big “No.”

I come home from work most days tired, and either stressed or annoyed. Though I work hard not to take these feelings out on my husband, I do complain to him about them. What I didn’t realize is that to him, the two are often interchangeable.

Interestingly, I had read this post on BiblicalWomanhood.com on Thursday. Perhaps this loving Christian wife’s pitfall helped to me acknowledge my own, and be more open to the criticism of my husband than I might be otherwise. While it’s good to know that I’m not the only wife that falls into this pattern, it’s scary to think that women (or men) are habitually taking their frustrations from outside the home and planting them in the very place that, in my husband’s words, “is supposed to be safe.”

Benjamin & me on our honeymoon, August 2007

We have enough things to worry about at home without bringing in outside contamination. Home is supposed to be safe – and while “safe” to me may mean being able to voice my frustrations, “safe” to my husband is being able to enjoy his wife in a pleasant environment.

This is not to say that I should not share things that have a significant impact on our lives. I don’t think my husband would suggest that, either. But if I can strive to limit my venting to things that really matter, I will more thoroughly honor my husband. I want my life to revolve around home – not work, traffic, or trivial worries.

We should show the greatest respect and love to those closest to us. And though I had convinced myself that I was respecting him by being open, he only felt disrespected and dumped-on. I need to show his definition of respect, just as I want to be shown mine.

Home Sweet Home

(Original post at www.abforever.blogspot.com)

Well, sort of =P

It's been forever since I've written on this thing, so I don't really even know where to start! Benjamin and I had a beautiful wedding, made complete by our family and friends who shared it with us. I can't believe that I wanted an outdoor reception, though. It was hot! Mom & I checked the forecast the day before the wedding, and all was supposed to be sunny and dry. On Saturday, though, we realized that Benjamin didn't have the vest to his tuxedo, so we made an emergency trip out. It was nice though...we were so busy that neither of us had an opportunity to really get nervous!

Ok, well I'm getting ahead of myself lol. Julie & I went to Houston on Tuesday, and Tuesday night Megan, Jill and Veronica threw my bachelorette party. It was lots of fun...they even had a Disney princess tablecloth! (though there were some "inappropriate" paraphernalia drawn on it hehe). I got a little loopy and ended up falling asleep. I was partially awake again when they had a slightly-dressed guy burst through the front door and run through the living room.

Benjamin was supposed to work all day on Thursday and then drive to Houston on Thursday night. However, the little sucker (ok, sweet and sexy babe) left work without telling me and showed up at my parents' house in the very early evening!

On Friday night we had the official rehearsal. However, it didn't really count, because Julie was in Georgia for a convention, Amanda was on her way to Houston, Jason was at training for his new job, the flower girl was en route, and the minister was at church camp in Ohio. Benjamin & I went to get manicures & pedicures, and were a little late. The "wedding coordinator" (aka meany-poopy-head) was a total snot, and started treating me like a little kid. She was telling Benjamin's parents to do the wrong things, and trying to completely take over myyyyyy wedding!

Wedding Coordinator: come on!
Benjamin's mom: I think we weren't supposed to walk in during this song.
Wedding Coordinator: It doesn't matter, it's fine.
Me: *nicely* Hey, could we try that again, with the other song?
Wedding Coordinator: You want to do it again?!
Me: *slightly less nice* Well, they weren't supposed to come in to this song.
Wedding Coordinator: *huff*

Later...
Wedding Coordinator: You need to do the unity candle now.
Me: *listening to the minister/Benjamin/etc* *notice she's yapping, so I look at her*
Wedding Coordinator: *really snotty look* Can we take this seriously please?
Me: Sure. *hand on hip, 4th grade girl rebellious look*...(hey, it was my wedding)
Wedding Coordinator: Fine! I'll just let you do it your way.
(keep in mind, we didn't want her there in the first place...she wasn't "coordinating" anything)
Me: *sweet tone* Thank you!
Wedding Coordinator: Uh! *snatches our candles & walks off to get her purse*
Wedding Coordinator: *to my dad* It doesn't look like you'll be needing my services here any more this evening.
Dad: Oh, ok! Bye!

I asked Ethan if he had gotten it all on tape, and he said yes. I can't wait to see it. She was sooo mad hehe.

The day of the wedding went smoothly for the most part. I was a little worried that something major would be forgotten, but it was all great. I remember making Julie go out & take pictures from the balcony so I could make sure enough people were there to start. (I didn't want everyone having to be in the balcony!) When Dad & I came in, I hardly noticed anyone in the audience. I didn't realize beforehand that I wouldn't see the audience at all until we were presented Mr. and Mrs. The main things about the ceremony that were "funny" I suppose, were that I couldn't blow out my candle after lighting the unity candle because my veil blocked it, so Benjamin had to blow it out. Then, when Benjamin was allowed to "kiss the bride," we kissed for what I guess was a long time. People started laughing, and the minister kind of cleared his throat a little. At the reception, Jill, Veronica & Matthew commented that it was quite passionate. Jill said she accidentally pinched Matthew, and Veronica said, "I'm told that if you begin a marriage with a lot of passion, it'll continue that way. So, I think you'll have a passionate marriage!"

When I tossed the bouquet, Julie & Amanda had a little tustle. I have a picture of them both going for it, and another one where Amanda has a "ha!" look on her face, and Julie has her fists clinched and seems to be charging. It's awesome =P

Juliane & Ryan gave their speeches, and both were so heartfelt. I know that Benjamin and I love our siblings dearly, and were so glad to be able to share the first wedding for both families with them.

I rode all the way to Galveston in my wedding dress. This was not the best idea, for 2 reasons. One, it can feel somewhat comfy while you're standing up, but when it's late and you're tired, and the bra is digging into your boobies and bruising your sternum, it's not quite so comfortable. Two, we didn't really think ahead about how we were going to fit my giant dress in our luggage for the cruise. But, I wanted Benny to be able to take it off of me, so I suppose it was worth it. And since he doesn't pack much stuff, there was room in his suitcase :)

We spent Saturday night and Sunday night in Galveston. Sunday we walked around a little bit, went to the grocery store, and got a pizza from Dominos. Or Pizza Hut. One of those places lol. Monday we took a taxi to the port. Benjamin wanted to make sure we were there "on time," so we ended up getting there before anyone else. We were wearing our "Bride" and "Groom" shirts, so everyone we talked to thought we were part of a wedding party. Of course, that meant that they sent us up to the waiting room with the actual wedding party, which was apparently preparing of an on-board wedding. Other than them we were the first ones on the boat! We had opted to carry most of our luggage on, a decision that we remedied getting off the boat. (If you take a cruise, don't carry your stuff. It's a long walk.) Going through security, one of my bags set off the alarm, and when we saw which one, I freaked. (You don't need to know the details.) To make a long story short, we had crashed Benjamin's bachelor party the week before, and his mom had gotten some handcuffs for me to put on him during our raid. I had stuck them in my bag and forgotten about them, and, well...apparently they don't allow handcuffs on cruise ships. Oops!

On the boat, we lugged all of our luggage (is that why they call it luggage?) to go eat lunch before the rooms were ready. Benjamin called our parents to tell them we had made it, and his mom told him a funny story. It totally made our day. Everyone, including Mrs. Wedding Coordinator, had been asked not to wear perfume to the wedding, because of allergies. She showed up about 10 minutes before the wedding:
Ryan: Do you have the candles for lighting the unity candle?
Wedding Coordinator: I don't know! I thought you didn't need me!
Ryan: *really nice voice* We don't...we just need the candles.
Wedding Coordinator: Well, I may have some in my car. I'll check.
Later...
Aaron (usher): *doesn't know who she is* Are you friend or family?
Wedding Coordinator: Well, I'm not family!
Aaron: *smells perfume on her* Ok, well I'm going to need you to sit up here.
Wedding Coordinator: *epitome of ticked off*

My parents and Benjamin's parents had gone to lunch on Monday, so they got to hear the story before we did. The cruise was awesome! I wasn't scared at all, and I didn't get seasick! More about that later, perhaps. Our room steward learned our names, and would always come in our room while we were gone & make cool towel animals to put on the bed. He even arranged my pink pillow on the bed with the others =P

We stopped in Progresso and Cozumel. In Progresso, I got sick from the cigarette smoke and the heat, so we just bought some tequila and got back on the boat. In Cozumel, we did some shopping. Benjamin wanted to rent a motorcycle thing, but I forgot about the fact that we could go all over the island. Instead, we bought more tequila (he brought back a ton of tequila), and took lots of pictures. It sprinked a bit, and we were ready to go in, so we got back on the boat and drank a margarita. On the last day, we needed 4 more cups to complete our "4 yellow, 4 pink" collection, so we had to get started early. We split our first pina colada around 10 am. And I don't hold liquor very well, so needless to say I was a little wobbly for the rest of the day.

Now we're back (duh, Adriane), and getting into the swing of things. The apartment still isn't organized, but at least we've opened all the presents, and the ones we need to take back are filling up the back seat of my car. I still have a ton of thank you notes to write, but I'm dreading that. I think it's the sheer volume of notes that is stressing, not the act itself. If I do like 20 a day, it shouldn't take too long.

What's that?!? An update?!? Why, yes, I believe it is!

(Original post at www.abforever.blogspot.com)

Though I've been terribly busy, my laziness in regard to blogging was recently brought to my attention by dear 'ole Zahra. Indeed, this page is in desperate need of an update :)

As previously mentioned, the wedding date is Saturday, August 4. That's right at 7 1/2 weeks from now! Obviously, I'm quite excited, and I'm continuously counting the days.

We're still working on finishing up the invitations. They have been something of a project, and I'm thankful to have had a lot of help. I hope to have them mailed out early next week, but as with everything, I need to be flexible.

My parents have done a ton of work on the guest list, and making arrangements with the church at which the ceremony will be held. They've made calls and ordered my dress, and been more than supportive of mine and Benjamin's goals. Benjamin's mom and sister worked with us on the invitations well into the night a couple of weekends ago, helping us to put a huge dent in the amount of work. Nana is addressing envelopes this week, and I'm glad she's being patient with my ever-changing list of addresses. Megan has volunteered her expertise to design the jewelry for the wedding. Julie and Amanda have worked their schedules around mine, and taken time out to search for the perfect bridesmaid dresses. I can't wait to see how they look on all of the girls!

My fiance (whee!) has been nothing but helpful over the past couple of weeks. Along with putting in overtime at work, he has been making frequent trips to Houston on the weekends (we've gone 3 times in a month!), making plans for our honeymoon, gathering addresses, and cooperating with my sometimes-emotional nature. He's even been spending his evenings gluing bows and paper cakes onto invitations. He has had such a willing attitude, that I feel much more at ease and less worried that I'm going to forget something or run out of time to get things done. Benjamin has made it clear that he does not want to view the planning from the sidelines, and I can't thank him enough for all of his involvement.

Well, last night we (hopefully) finished our Target registry! We have a few more things to add at Macy's, but I think that's going to wait until the weekend. We have some pieces of furniture picked out, and I think we'll be very happy with our decisions. We're still excited about our ducky-themed bathroom!

Haha, I just realized that I keep typing "we"...I can't wait to be "Mr. and Mrs." <3

Yesterday I got a call from the bridal store saying that my dress & veil & petticoat and all that fun stuff have come in! I need to go in to get everything finalized, and then I'll get to bring my wedding dress home & hang it in the closet where I can look at it every day. I can just see myself walking around in athletic pants eating ice cream & staring at my dress. That reminds me of a conversation I had right after I moved to college in August 2005...

Zahra was reading me excerpts from "The Complete Handbook for College Women" & came across a section on eating disorders.
Me: *eats a peanut M&M*
Zahra: Accept & appreciate your body in its natural state
Me: *sits & thinks*
Me: *eats another M&M"
Zahra: Reward yourself for accomplishing tasks...
Zahra: ...For example, treat yourself to a night at the movies, a call to a friend, or a couple of your favorite jelly donuts
Zahra: "So then you can get fat & love your body in its natural state"

Tonight, Benjamin came over and I bought my first alcohol. Of course, given the hobbies of my company, it was beer =P I tried to drink it with a straw, but Benjamin put a stop to that. Apparently "you don't drink beer with a straw." Who knew? =P

I should probably get to bed...I'm blinking to stay awake lol. It's been a tough couple of weeks, and I think it's time for a pre-midnight bedtime :)

The Proposal

(Original post at www.abforever.blogspot.com)

Benjamin and I had been seriously discussing marriage for several months. Still, he wouldn’t give any hints as to when or how he planned to propose. So I waited (sometimes impatiently, to which he will attest) for him to get everything ready.

On Saturday, May 12, 2007, I suspected nothing. Honestly, despite the fact that I was sure a proposal was coming soon, the possibility of it happening that weekend didn’t really enter my mind.

That morning, we had made plans to go to the Botanic Gardens after church. We had been there about a month before for a picnic (I absolutely love picnics), and it is beautiful. That time, I actually thought he might propose. Later, I thought about telling him that I would really like him to do it there, but decided against such an intervention, as he said he already knew what he planned to do. I didn’t suspect anything this time, though, because he asked very casually if I wanted to go. Plus, I was tired of getting my hopes up =P

We went to church in Fort Worth as usual. The building is always chilly, but it was especially freezing during the Bible study. Normally, Benjamin would have given me his jacket, but this time he kept it on, fanned himself with the handout, and offered to get my princess blanket out of the car. (He brought it up later, explaining that he didn’t want me to be wearing his jacket & notice the ring inside.)

During church I whispered that I was looking forward to going to the park. He took that opportunity to ask if I minded Ryan (his little brother) coming with us, because Ryan wanted to ride in his new car. I felt kindof let down, thinking that Benjamin should have known that I consider parks our own little romantic thing. I said that if he needed a ride home, we could just go another day, trying to hide my disappointment.

After church, Benjamin said that he would go pull up the car (since he had parked a long way out to avoid “dings”) while I finished my drink inside. However, it took him longer than I expected because, as I later learned, he needed to move the ring to his guitar case. Again I inadvertently interfered, when my impatience led me out to the car in my 4” heels.

When we arrived at the Botanic Gardens, he handed me the blanket and asked me to go set up under our tree while he found a way to cover his camera and guitar in the back seat. (Due to my previous interruption, he still needed to move the ring.) I unknowingly made his objective harder, insisting that we walk together. Finally I said, “just bring your camera with you, and leave your guitar uncovered in the car.” We walked to our tree and laid out the blanket. On the way, I saw some people taking wedding pictures, and pointed it out to Benjamin. I’ve been doing this from time to time, partially because I think it’s neat, and partially to remind him that I want to get married…as if he had forgotten lol.

As we were still wearing church clothes, Benjamin said he wanted to change into flip-flops. By this time, I was like, “It’s about to rain, and you’re concerned about changing out of your shoes?” He insisted on getting them from the car, so I waited. When he returned, he only brought his guitar.

He started playing a song from memory as usual, but then stopped. He picked up a page of tabs from his case, and told me he hadn’t put the rest back in there after he cleaned it out. I just thought, oh, ok…new song, cool, what is it?

Scanning the page as though he had not played the song before, he answered, “It’s called ‘Question’.” I’ve heard the song, so I’m sitting there thinking, “Greeeeat! I know he’s not going to propose today, yet he’s going to sight read this song about proposing.” I started to inform him of this little discrepancy, but he had already started playing. I figured, Oh well, he’ll figure it out in a minute, and we can have a good laugh. When he got to the chorus, I realized he knew the song and had picked it intentionally:

Someday somebody’s gonna ask you
A question that you should say yes to
Once in your life, maybe tonight
I’ve got a question for you.

I also grasped that he seemed to know the tune awfully well for never having heard it. I looked at his face, saw his nervousness and excitement, and focused on experiencing the final seconds of singleness.

When he finished the song, Benjamin set down his guitar and picked up a wooden ring box. By this time he was crying. He opened the box, and said, “I love you so much. Will you marry me?”

I, of course, immediately said “yes,” and leaned over to kiss my fiancé. I may have whispered it, because later he asked if I had actually ever said yes.

Then I finally got a good look at the ring. It was a beautiful square solitaire in a shiny platinum setting. I had not helped to pick out the ring, and even though he knew what cut I wanted, I had been a bit nervous about what he’d select. But as with everything he’s picked out for me, it was perfect. He started to hand it to me, but I said, “you have to put it on my finger!” When he slid the ring onto my finger, I was happier than ever.

I didn’t react at all how I always thought I would – I figured I’d either shriek or start bawling. I don’t think I fully believed everything that was happening. After all, he wasn’t “supposed” to do it then!

As we packed up and left, it started to rain. I love the rain, I love the park, and I love my wonderful husband-to-be.

"Update!" says Zahra

I went to the post office yesterday to mail back my apartment keys. Line was too long. I left & went to to work.

I went to the post office today to mail back my apartment keys. Line was too long. I left & went to work.

Last night I stayed at the hospital with Mom. She's doing SOOOO much better mentally. On Wednesday she had a talk with Nana, Cameron & me, and I cried. She was so deep...and giving so much credit to God that I had never expected her to do at this point.

I got a new church bag from the Christian bookstore next to Ben & Jerry's today. I love it, so I got it as a Pentecost gift to myself :)

Myspace is creepy...
addicat123: zahra?? i just got asked out on myspace
addicat123: this thing has been infiltrated with losers
PRZNchika: eek!!! who asked you out?
addicat123: from "tony"...i thought it was cake boy, but...its not
addicat123: i realized that after reading the first sentence
addicat123: " Hey there, if there is one thing about you, it's you smile, you're sooo cute!! Couldn't resist :-) ADD ME AS YOUR FRIENDS IN MYSPACE, WILL YA? ;-) I sometimes go to some salsa places on fri nites. Free fri nite around 9pm? lets go hang/chill. cell .. to coordinate, if interested? "
PRZNchika: eek did he have a picture?
addicat123: its a pool lol
PRZNchika: you got asked out by a pool!
addicat123: ha! yes!
addicat123: twas my dream
addicat123: and a motorcycle...and a car
PRZNchika: well please do not agree to going out with tony-the-pool-and-not-the-cake-boy
PRZNchika: k?
addicat123: (after i clicked on "pics")
addicat123 (9:32:22 PM): addicat123: PRZNchika: ohhh
PRZNchika: a pool
PRZNchika: motorcycle
PRZNchika: AND car
PRZNchika: this tony is them all.
PRZNchika: he can change shape!!!
addicat123: this tony is a magician
PRZNchika: i don't know tony the magician
PRZNchika: tony the cake boy was a bit confused though.
addicat123: im sorry zahra
addicat123: we'll get quiktrip...that'll solve that problem
PRZNchika: yes, yes it will

Right before I was (supposed to) leave work today, there was a huge rush. One guy in line, as I was ringing up his order, asked "Do you get bothered here a lot?" Confused, I replied, "umm, no not really." He asked if people often prank call the story asking for Ben or Jerry, and said that he's the type of person to do that. I think I may have said that it would be funny if people did. He kept talking about it, but I was busy & got back to work, where I promptly forgot about it.

About 5 minutes later, Bryan handed me the phone & said, "umm, it's for you." He said he thought it was my dad. So I took the phone, and the voice on the other end said, "is Ben or Jerry there?" and started laughing. I sarcastically responded, "eh, funny...thanks goodbye" in my "you're being dumb but I'm humoring you to be nice" tone. However, as I hung up I couldn't help but laugh...I had to admit, it WAS funny.

Then I asked Bryan how they asked for me. He said they asked by name. But I didn't tell them my name. A few minutes later, after the issue had been dropped, Bryan came back out and said, "umm, yeah...that's a little creepy."

Misspellings

ilovemystery: i dont have class on mon
addicat123: whee!
addicat123: then you'll have the whooole day with me & i can meat the boyfriend
addicat123: oops...meet
addicat123: (freudian slip)

Catch the pun?!?!

I'm oh so funny...sometimes I crack myself up :)

addicat123: i look forward to meating him
ilovemysterymeat: lol
ilovemysterymeat: u did it again
addicat123: man, i guess i'll never learn ;-)
ilovemysterymeat: just dont beat him up

I find it strangely satisfying that someone feels the need to specify this :)

Whee Dallas Trip!

Though I originally hoped to leave at 4:30 Friday morning, I didn't really leave until about 8:30. Sleep = important! I filled up with gas and, as per Dad's request, stopped every hour-ish. The trip was peaceful, and by the time I hit Huntsville (about an hour) I had run out of coffee and tired of the whole putting-your-foot-on-the-gas thing (those 2 things are not related). Thanks, Dad, for exposing me to the beauty that is cruise control :)

I had been doing quite well and was confident in my innate ability to navigate from Houston to Dallas. Perhaps I became too sure of myself, because while on the phone with Dad I suddenly realized that I was no longer on I-45. No sir, I was headed to Ft Worth!
Me: blah blah blah wait! Dad I'm on I-20 headed to Ft Worth!
Dad: *patronizingly* I dont think you want to do that
Me: well it's either that or Shreveport!
It's ok. Thanks to said navigating instincts (ha, right) I found my way home.

When I arrived at the apartment, Zahra was here to greet me. Julie was out with a boy, much to my disapproval. Julie, darling, no dating. You're married, remember? Zahra & I considered 2 restaurants for dinner (Cabbi-somthing's and Maggiano's). As you can probably tell from my inability tor recal the first, we chose Maggiano's "Little Italy" (so cute!) Zahra called & made reservations...the only time available was 5:45!!! I insisted that she make the reservation for "Jasmine" (her princess). Then we went to QuikTrip (whee!!) and my slushie gave me a tummy ache. Julie got home & we weren't here. When we did arrive, she was in the bathroom so we did a really crummy job of hiding between her dresser & closet.
Julie: *coming out of bathroom* Zahra? Adriane?
Zahra & Me: *silence + quiet giggling*
Julie: *goes into living room & starts singing*
We decided she didn't care about us! (jk Julie)

I was not a vivacious enough driver, so we were about 15 minutes late for our reservation. We got virgin Miami vices with lots of cherries (we told Guam, our name for all waiters, that we needed them to be very pretty & worthy of our picture-taking). Zahra ordered the marlin (or as Julie says, maaaaahlin) and it was tiny. False advertising on Guam's part. Julie & I both got the chicken & spinach manicotti and it was huge. However, we both noted with a sad sigh the absence of vegatables.

Due to our forced early reservation, we were finished with dinner before it even started to get dark. But this gave us an opportunity to do what we do best when we venture out of our apartment - PICTURES!!!! The outdoor architecture & landscaping was beautiful. Oh, and my dress kept trying ot fly up...once it actually did! And we pretended to be the valets while they were gone. Then Julie sneaked a not-so-subtle picture of them upon their return.

Yesterday, Julie & I went to see She's The Man at the dollar theater. Great movie! Cheesy, but hilarious. We stopped at Sonic to get drinks first, and Julie put them in her purse :) After the movie, we walked out of the theater & I smoothly put my cup in the trash can. Julie, however, continued sipping from her's as we walked through the halls, proudly (but unconsciously) sporting the huge Sonic logo.
Me: *whispering* Julie! Your cup says Sonic really big!
Julie: *jolt! looks around! puts cup down around her knees!*
Me: *uncontrolable laughter that catches the attention of our fellow movie-goers*

So, I would like to publicly proclaim:
Happy Birthday Zahra!!!

Ok, here's that nostalgic post we've all been waiting for!

Stop. Go no further. Start the song Closing Time. Have you started it? Ok good. Now you may proceed.

In about 12 hours (I’ve been working on this throughout the day), I'm going to be moving for the 2nd time in a year. I'm so unbelievably happy to get to go home, see my family, spend oodles of time with my Mom...it's been hard living so far away. By the same token, though, I'm going to be so sad to leave this place - this apartment that has become my home away from home, these friends, this environment of intellectual stimulation. So, in the style of Zahra's post (her's is more picture-inclusive than mine), I shall proceed to give a list of grievances. Ah, how this reminds me of a day about 8 months ago when I was doing this very same thing.

While I'm certainly going to miss many aspects of this life I'm leaving, most of it revolves around the lovely girls of apartment ****. These girls have turned into more than amiable roommates. They've made my freshman year experience one that I will always look back upon with fondness. They have attained the status of best friends. And for that, they hold a special, irreplaceable place in my heart. I will miss them the most.

Things I Love About Julie
* Her French accent which she "can't help"
* Her decision to marry Switchfoot...collectively
* The inertia which causes her arms to flail behind her torso upon walking
* The way I never dread the sound of "Aaa-dri-on" (now "A-shri-on") in the distance
* She is always ready to watch a Lifetime movie with me & Sparky
* Her insistence on consuming every last speck of...whatever (lick that bowl, Julie!)
* The way she confidently declares herself endearing...but that she doesn't fully comprehend the limitlessness of that statement
* Her daily updates on Erwin in my absence
* Finding her slippers tucked neatly under the table for her to come back to
* Her pretty paintings that make our living room sparkle

Things I Love About Zahra
* Her beastly willingness to protect us amid our Lifetime fears…and to fight
* The fact that she LIVES to "lock me out"
* The way she "moves in" every Sunday evening
* That she is "the world's official hugger"...and never fails to deliver on that
* That she designates and entire load of laundry to her panties
* Her offer to come all the way to Houston just to chaperone a date
* That we reached a consensus to take a nap under the warm pink UTD blanket after Hope Floats

Things I Love About Valene
* Her facial expression after muttering “huh?”
* Her disgust with spinach…and our taste for it
* That she gave me part of the vacuum fuzz after cleaning it out
* The unrecognized peer pressure which she exerts on the rest of us with her spiffy sayings

I’ll miss the Waterview network connection hating me, and kicking me off alllll the time. Zahra, thank you for not blocking me on AIM, even though you threatened to do so. Having a reliable internet connection will be saddening.

I’ll miss Julie grabbing Luke & Lorelai with her bare hands so that we can clean their filthy water. I’ll miss having 4 people around to feed them constantly. And I’ll miss making beta babies!

I’ll miss the free movies that Valene found as part of our cable package. Sleepless in Seattle, West Side Story, Funny Girl…all better when you have great girls to share them with. Oh what fun, moving the couch up to the TV…we’re tough girls!

I’ll miss naming the boys that come into our lives. More than that, I’ll miss having those boys around to do things for us. I wonder if my brother….

I’ll miss hearing Julie’s door open in the mornings, and jumping out of bed immediately. That was better than any alarm clock. What! Julie’s up before me?! Aaaah!

I’ll miss calling the maintenance men for everything that needs done in our apartment. I treasure all of those maintenance reports that we have laying around. We’re on a first-name basis with several of them now!

I’ll miss looking at Jackie Chan every time I go into Julie’s room. I have to say, he’s beginning to grow on me now. Of course, the same can’t be said of Julie’s attitude toward my fuzzy posters. It’s ok…I’ll also miss her systematically removing them from my walls in the hope that I won’t notice.

I’ll miss shouting “someone’s food is ready” because the impatient microwave keeps beeping once a minute.

I’ll miss Julie trying to make me get new PJs. You’ve tried everything, and I’m still wearing cheeky monkey! Perhaps, though, we can get matching ones in accordance with your bribe.

I’ll miss the interrogation chair, and the reign of WABB over our relationships with boys. I’ll miss the confused look on many guys’ faces as we actually carried out the interrogations we promised. Remember when Cake Boy (ok ok, Tony) brought us that HUGE cake as a peace offering? I’m glad we gave him another chance.

I’ll miss Julie’s singing on the way to the grocery store or the movies. You’ve made me love Moulin Rouge, hun! You’re so unbelievably cute.

I’ll miss Thursday lunches in the PUB. How I’ve looked forward to those each week, and hated missing them on occasion. Even when I would be working the lunch rush, it was cheering just to see you guys come in.

I’ll miss the PUB itself, and the good friends I have made working there. I’m so blessed to be able to have fun at my job.

I’ll miss Roommate Weekends, and broadcasting our mutual love to the masses. “Do you have roommates? You should get some.”

I’ll miss taking trips in our pajamas. Wal-Mart, the Meteor Theater, the mailbox…ah, the memories.

I’ll miss Julie singing “Bad Day” and playing it on her computer when I have one. I’ll miss being able to hear the song on her computer when she goes to Zahra’s xanga, since my computer hates me & won’t play it.

I’ll miss having a home to come back to when I feel weezy.

I’ll miss taking pictures of everything. It feels like everything we’ve done has been properly documented visually. I love our three best pictures.

I’ll miss the menopausal weather. Hot. Cold. Moderately warm. Freezing beyond comprehension. Yeah, it’s always a surprise. Sorry I’ve been slacking on delivering the weather report each morning!

I’ll miss having no room in the refrigerator for legitimate stuff (like milk) because it is so full of to-go boxes.

I’ll miss the yellow walls, and Julie’s paintings.

I’ll miss finding my panties in a bag on my doorknob. I’ll miss having girls around who understand how you can have an entire bag full of panties.

I’ll miss waking up to the shrill sound of smoke detectors…and laughing in the living room while they continue to shriek for half an hour in the middle of the night.

I’ll miss eating french fries from the PUB. But not before we’ve re-cooked them in the oven & showered them with Tony Chachere’s (sp??)

But more than all of that, I’ll miss having girls to call maintenance for me. I’ll miss hearing my name (with a French accent, of course) on a daily basis. I’ll miss the people with whom I take grocery store trips, and the girls that live to lock me out. I’ll miss having those awesome friends who are willing to ask weird questions to make sure that the guys I’m hanging out with are worth it. I’ll miss deep conversations that last until the wee hours of the morning, and buying lots of pillows with my new bedding, confident that we’ll use all of them.

The memories…

In the past 8 months and 19 days, we have accomplished so much. Much more than a group of skimpy college girls could be expected. We have:
(click the * for a picture!!)
* Gotten through a pregnancy & learned French insults
* Successfully sauntered Wal-Mart in PJs at midnight without getting raped
* Learned how to do normal body functions in a class that 1/3 of us don’t take
* Cured Julie of her brownie addiction
* Established ourselves as virgins
* Taken pictures with Abuelo
* Been through some hard times, and remained there for each other
* Experienced the awesomeness that is giant QuikTrip cups
* Considered skydiving together…nah!
* Had fun with balls (hehe)
* Shrunk our collective female fat zones
* Traded clothes & warned each other of possible death-by-weather
* Made it through Govt 2302. ‘Nuff said.
* Realized that our best dates are with each other
* Giggled about boy parts during Thursday lunch
* Put glucose tablets to a much more “creative” use
* Gotten married. Some of us more than others…
* Been totally awesome princesses
* Gotten gussied
* Turned on one another, but made it through in the end
* Been scarred by the sight of nakey boys & discussed nakey trees
* Ordered & eaten 3 medium 1-topping pizzas
* Handled the three-musty-Mexican-maintenance-men & called maintenance for EVERYthing! They must loooooove us!
* Discovered the tragedy of the female condom & hemorrhoids
* Prepared for a tornado
* Had a slumber party on the balcony
* Grown quite accustomed to talking on AIM & banging on walls
* Experienced the happiness of Julie & Zahra’s marriage
* Left Olive Garden with 10 to-go boxes
* Gleefully pounced upon each other
* Caught & detained the blog culprit…but she still commits her crimes!
* Become tenacious wildcats in Jujitsu
* Dedicated Zahra the confrontational-phone-call maker…for bills and the cable guy
* Named boys & done interrogations with WAAB
* Spoken out against modern sexuality
* Played some serious flag football
* Toasted our 1-month anniversary
* Disturbed an entire movie theater with our fashionable exit
* Learned where we come from…through the people upstairs
* Lived through fire
* Rewarded ourselves with a couple of our favorite jelly donuts
* Left our comfort zones & made new & lifelong friendships

Tonight we had our reminiscence session. We sat on the couch, in our PJs of course, and ate french fries. We talked about our time together. Zahra recalled “hating” me when I moved in, because I apparently gave her a weird look. How was I to know that she was supposed to be there?! We realized that we attended the same orientation last April. The 3 of us recalled our first eager telephone conversations and unleashed first impressions. Julie thought I was going to be a drunken popular girl…but when she came in & saw me “freaking out” over groceries, she knew she had nothing to fear. I thought she was going to be a really anal smart girl…which she is (without the anal part :-p). Zahra addressed how unfair I have been in taking up all of the communal kitchen & storage space…and Julie agreed. Apparently, I have too much crap…but I can’t live without it. Then Julie started to go into her room. I thought she was coming to my room to read this screen (a super no-no) so I ran to stop her. In the process I hurt my foot. She doesn’t care…she said I deserved it. Poo. :-)

I’m sitting here, now at 2:30 in the morning, after just having had a discussion with Julie. Mostly, we talked about how much I miss orchestra & what a big part of my life that was. I’ve often thought about where I would be in my musical pursuits if I had followed my original plan to go elsewhere.

But tonight, after our reminiscence session, I realized that Julie, Zahra & I ALL wanted to go elsewhere. I wanted to go to Sam Houston & major in music. Zahra wanted to go to Rice & made this known through her attitude at UTD orientation. Julie wanted to go to Baylor & got a new car instead. I remember fighting my parents about this school, telling them it was the last place I wanted to go. I even had all of my friends hating the idea with me.

Even after deciding that I did want to come here, I still catch myself wondering. I wonder what I might have kept if I hadn't abandoned my “first choice.” What’s ironic is that after 8 months, I now realize what I would have lost if I had.

Love Always,
Adriane

"O" for Othello

After we watched Funny Girl & 10 Things I Hate About You, Julie & I watched "O", a modern take on Shakespeare's Othello. From about the 10th minute of the movie, we both knew we would hate it. Then there was a terrrrrible $3x scene in which Julie & I were both quite disturbed. So, we finally started fast-forwarding it. It still continued for a loooong time, and needless to say it was still scarring. It's that kind of movie that you end up having really bad dreams about. It was about a highschool basketball team, but everyone still died! I thought they'd just get alienated from each other & have no friends in college...boy was I wrong.

So to get rid of potential bad dreams, after checking all the doors, we re-watched the Heath-singing-to-Julia scene in 10 Things I Hate About You.

And we recalled the scene in the library, where the girl tells the boy, in French, "...maybe it's up your @$$." We decided to learn how to say this phrase, in French, but after several times of rewinding it, we still couldn't get the whole thing. Julie suggested, "hey, maybe we can just learn the 'up your @$$ part!" So we did. Lest I forget while I'm sleeping, it is, "fro tu cou" or something of similar pronounciation.

We also watched the scene between the daughter & father, where she's trying to get permission to go to prom. Julie kept rewinding that part, telling me "I want to learn the exact wording so when you want to go out with some boy I can say it." So, here's that part:
Father: Kissing...that's what you think happens? I've got news for you, kissing isn't what keeps me up to my elbows in placenta all day long.
Bianca: Can we forget for a second that you're severely unhinged & discuss my need for a night of teenage normalcy?
Father: What's normal, eh, those Dawson's River kids sleeping in each other's beds? I've got news for you. I'm down, I've got the 411, and you are not going out & getting jiggy with some boy, I don't care how dope his ride is. My momma didn't raise no fool.

[NB! There is probably another post JUST LIKE this one immediately below. DO NOT attempt to comment upon that post. You will probably be electricuted through your keyboard or mouse. I tried to delete it, but it refuses to leave. I tell you this for your own good. DO, however, comment on this post :D]

Fuming

I'm sick & tired of some guys acting "nice" and then deciding to behave like the pushy, needy people they are. Not all guys, of course, but some. So in case anyone is reading this who hasn't gotten it through their head, MY PRIORITIES ARE HERE TO STAY SO GET USED TO IT OR LEAVE ME ALOOOOONE! And to all the girls out there, any worthwhile guy who claims to like you will appreciate that you have priorities and are not a needy whiney brat. They will love that you are devoted to things other than them. It is the kind of guy that, before you've even met (which I know was against my better judgement & the judgement of those who care about me) says, "well you SAID blah blah blah and NOW you're saying that your SCHEDule is BUSy blah blah blah..." I have one response for that: I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOUUUUUUU! This is the kind of guy that girls marry & then get killed by out of their heinous jealousy. Stop expecting me to get off the phone with someone else to talk to you. I said we could meet cause I like to make new friends at school. THAT DOESN'T MEAN WE'RE DATING! That doesn't mean you get to ask where I am all the time or what I was doing when you tried to call me. I am strong & smart, and I'm not going to cower to a guy to feel validated. I look forward to the time when I find a man with whom I can have a meaningful conversation, discuss religion and God, our families, and our aspirations. I hope to find that he who shares my beliefs, whom I can respect. ALL YOU'VE DONE IS SENT ME MESSAGES & TRIED TO GET ME TO MEET YOU OFF CAMPUS! NO! I'm busy! I'll make an exception & meet you (because I think it's rather creepy to meet people online without any other connection) in a public place on campus and play chess or pool. THAT'S IT! And STOP acting so annoyed and hurt that I'm busy. If we're going to be friends, you're going to have to learn that sometimes other things are going on that you have to work around. Julie's learned it! Zahra's learned it! Megan & Andrew & Josh have learned it! Even my Mom has learned it! And these people are very close to me! WE'RE NOT GOING TO BE DATING!
I've gone off completely...sorry to those who must read it. This person probably isn't even reading this post, and if he is, well, then this situation just got a lot creepier. Here's how I feel, for those who care. I am strong & independent. I'm not going to let a guy think he owns me. I do look forward to someday finding "the one" who genuinely cares, but doesn't try to be overly controling. Even in dating, you have to be your own person. One day I hope to get married, and that man will be one for whom I have deep respect & admiration. I'll be able to trust him and his judgement, and we will make decisions together. I will call him when I get somewhere, but not because I'm forced to. Until then, I'm sick & tired of the few stupid guys out there making me sick & tired. I know there are a lot of great ones.
NOW I need to write my term paper.

Today was strange... :-/

And I'm really tired, so I'm not gonna elaborate...just the skeletons lol.

By "today" I mean Tuesday February 7. That gets so confusing to people when the clock strikes twelve.

We watched a video in Gender Studies on female to male transexuals. They were very vivid. And forthcoming. And we heard the "p-word" a lot. And saw photographs (that one guy took of himself). But it was very interesting & informative!

Also, I sit on the front row, and there happened to be a cricket at the front of the room. The girl next to me & I both don't like crickets, and definately didn't want it coming any closer to us. So during the discussion after the video, we kept looking over the table to make sure the creature was kept at bay. At one point, we could no longer see it by looking over the table, and took to looking under it. We tried not to be too obvious, as class did not cease for our insect-watching. I looked away for a bit, and then I heard the girl next to me jump, so I jumped & let out a very soft shriek (no, I did not scream). Dr. Smith asked, "are we having insect problems over here?" and proceeded to step on it. Then the lady at the end of the row covered her mouth due to the killing of the bug. So, here we have 3 girls at the front of the class shocked (for various reasons), and Dr. Smith apologizing for killing the cricket. I love that class!

Zahra basically told me at lunch that she doesn't want to be my friend anymore:
(talking about my AIM always malfunctioning)
Kaitlyn: I just figured you weren't there, because you weren't answering...and my buddy list is always blinking with you signing on and off.
Zahra: Yeah...I get annoyed by that...I thought about blocking you.
Me: Thanks, Zahra. Really...thanks.

At work, we had a very very very very very scary event. Basically (as it was so artfully phrased by my coworker) this guy was the text book example of a complaining customer. We weren't quite sure whether he was going to pull out a gun & start shooting. I almost cried. However, it is so funny now to think about...like incredibly insane.

And then Piotr decided that I should be the pack animal for restocking. So when we went to the storage room, I got to carry back 2 jugs of mocha, 4 bags of hot lids, 3 bags of cold lids, and 2 bags of cups in one trip.

After work, I stayed to play pool & watch Office Space. It was fun...I decided that I deserved it. Plus, I haven't seen Office Space in a very long time, and when I did, I was too young to actually get most of it.

Ok, so that was actually a long-ish post, but whatever. Goodnight.

Funny Story

Disclaimer: I am plagiarizing this story from Zahra's xanga. She wrote it better than I ever could! Don't worry...I asked first.

Funny story: Adriane, Julie, Kaitlyn, Jessica and I were sitting in the Comet Cafe today for lunch and Adriane was telling us about the book she has to read for gender studies. This particular chapter of the said book had the word... um... for a boy part, in there quite a few times and the theory they presented was quite funny. Well, being the immature people that we are, we of course did not say the p-word but rather alluded to it with "boy part"... until Adriane's id got the better of her conscious and she said the word really really loudly and then we all commenced to make fun of her. :P poor Adriane, she turned the same color as her shirt. Her shirt was pink. It was quite amusing though I must say.